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Golbez
Dirty Bastid
 From: Michigan
Registered: 06-20-05
Posts: 1770
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http://img.4chan.org/b/src/1171163573109.jpg
If the link doesn't load properly, copy and paste the link into the browser. AKA this - img.4chan.org/b/src/1171163573109.jpg
Last edited by Golbez (02-11-07 04:18 AM)
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| 02-11-07 04:12 AM |
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Evil_Lurks
The Father
 From: New Jorsey
Registered: 03-23-05
Posts: 1864
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Uhh, ok.
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In a sec I throw the suc to your **** dick
Everybody hit the deck, Biggie bout to get some wreck
Quick to leave you in a coffin, for slick talkin
You better act like CeCe, and keep on walkin
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| 02-11-07 05:24 AM |
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MasTeR
E-S-L
 From: New Jersey
Registered: 04-27-05
Posts: 614
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work cited is the best rofl.
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Look at my soccor moves in my sig guys! Lemm > Me
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| 02-11-07 05:37 AM |
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Golbez
Dirty Bastid
From: Michigan
Registered: 06-20-05
Posts: 1770
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Yeah, dunno  Too bad; it was pretty enjoyable.
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| 02-15-07 05:26 PM |
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Iskander
Moderator
 From: In the aeroplane over the sea
Registered: 04-24-06
Posts: 359
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the second link worked when I first tried it
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my chalk outline will stalk these grounds
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| 02-16-07 12:55 AM |
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Golbez
Dirty Bastid
From: Michigan
Registered: 06-20-05
Posts: 1770
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rofl, the expansion and non-terrorist negotiations were the best. They were all pretty good though.
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| 02-18-07 07:49 PM |
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Anti
East Bay G
From: East Bay, Cali
Registered: 01-22-05
Posts: 833
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lol... i don't negotiate with terrorist is hilarious.
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| 02-18-07 07:57 PM |
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?nz!n
Final Countdown
 From: Long Island , New York
Registered: 04-02-06
Posts: 742
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ahhahaha funnyyyy
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| 02-18-07 08:40 PM |
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That's awesome. Were those the ones from that link?
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| 02-18-07 11:08 PM |
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Judy Rose wrote:
The e-mail says they are taken from actual high school essays and collected by English teachers across the country for their own amusement. Some of these kids may have bright futures as humor writers. What do you think?
1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a ThighMaster.
2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli, and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.
8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife?s infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.
9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn?t.
10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you?re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan?s teeth.
16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River.
18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut.
19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up. |
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| 02-18-07 11:19 PM |
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turek
From Ol' Skool
From: New Jersey
Registered: 04-20-05
Posts: 339
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Wicket,
during my hangover...im really depressed..but you ALWAYS seem to find a way to impress me...i just wish youw ere here to like take this feeling out like im gonna **** vomit any second....
but other then that GOOD **** MY JOLLY ENGLISHMAN
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When I write it,
I dont edit.
It's like God said it,
But gave me the credit
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| 02-19-07 12:39 AM |
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?nz!n
Final Countdown
From: Long Island , New York
Registered: 04-02-06
Posts: 742
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ah owner , your so ***
what would i do without owner in dbi
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| 02-19-07 12:54 AM |
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turek
From Ol' Skool
From: New Jersey
Registered: 04-20-05
Posts: 339
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if i was *** then how come you said "what would i do without owner in dbi" ...therefore your stating that your ***...
and since i know my sexuality and im not ***! ...meaning your ***...
gl hf <3
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When I write it,
I dont edit.
It's like God said it,
But gave me the credit
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| 02-19-07 04:40 PM |
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Anti
East Bay G
From: East Bay, Cali
Registered: 01-22-05
Posts: 833
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without owner, we'd all have to bob our own knobs... but thankfully we don't have this problem. 
and LOL... like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30 p.m.
Last edited by Anti (02-19-07 05:57 PM)
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| 02-19-07 05:56 PM |
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?nz!n
Final Countdown
From: Long Island , New York
Registered: 04-02-06
Posts: 742
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lol
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| 02-19-07 06:03 PM |
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Wicket
entertainment
 From: ILLINOIS
Registered: 12-07-04
Posts: 1013
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If you thought they were funny BUY THIS **** BOOK..
It made me laugh out loud more than every other book I've ever read put together. And I've read like 7 books.
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| 02-19-07 06:59 PM |
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Schaef
Hahahahaha
From: Hahahahaha
Registered: 08-26-05
Posts: 345
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Wicket get on xfire, thanks.
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| 02-19-07 10:53 PM |
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cheech
Certified Killer
From: Montreal, Canada
Registered: 11-15-06
Posts: 116
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lol wicket, you are so british, i love it!
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| 02-19-07 10:56 PM |
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Hedge
n00b
Registered: 01-12-07
Posts: 18
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| 02-22-07 10:26 PM |
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?nz!n
Final Countdown
From: Long Island , New York
Registered: 04-02-06
Posts: 742
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WOW LMAO
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| 02-22-07 10:43 PM |
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Golbez
Dirty Bastid
From: Michigan
Registered: 06-20-05
Posts: 1770
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Thanks, Hedge. You found a good link to it 
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| 02-23-07 01:07 AM |
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Hedge
n00b
Registered: 01-12-07
Posts: 18
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Yeah, my friend showed it to me a while ago.
I thought it was pretty funny, but pretty fake at the same time. The "teacher" has really bad handwriting and equally bad grammar.
Plus, I don't think that a paper like that would get an almost-passing grade.
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| 02-23-07 05:06 AM |
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How did he pull of a 61%? That's a lenient teacher/professor.
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| 02-23-07 05:10 AM |
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